A couple of people were asking about the COACH state process. Here’s a link to a short article explaining it, and contrasting it with the unresourceful CRASH.
http://standinginspirit.com/state-management-coach-and-crash-states/
And here’s a file with a sample script for the COACH state:
COACH State Script
Category: Other
Oh to be an eagle
And swoop down from a peak
With the golden sunlight flashing
From the fierce hook of my beak.
‘Oh to be an eagle
And to terrify the sky
With the beat of wings like thunder
And a wild, barbaric cry.
‘Oh to be an eagle…but why keep dreaming?
I must learn to be myself,’
Said the rubber duckling sadly
On its soapy bathroom shelf.
Shortly after his release Nelson Mandela was phoned with his congratulations by US President Bill Clinton. In the course of the conversation Clinton asked him, “Surely after such an experience of incarceration you must still feel some anger towards those who kept you in captivity?” Mandela replied “No, I realised if I didn’t let go of my anger then those who imprisoned me would still be in control of a part of my life.”
Location
Session 1 will be held in Shinsakae
102 Sanno Mansion Dai 2 Shinsakae, Shinsakae 3-14-6, Naka-ku, Nagoya 466-8555
Tel: 050-3722-6838
Cell: 090-7612-5413
You can see the location in Google Maps and print it out.
Preparation for the Session
Please download and read at least Chapter 1 of Dylan Morgan’s free online book: Hypnosis for Beginners.
Also bring the following to the workshop.
- A printout of Chapter 1 (or the whole book)
- Something to write with
- Something to write on
- An open mind
- Lots of curiosity
That’s about all that you will need to start exploring hypnosis, learning some great stuff, and having fun.
Session Details
To be announced
Tasks for the Next Session
We know that everyone is busy, so we’ll just ask that you do your best to carry out these tasks before the next session, keeping in mind the reason that you decided to learn hypnosis and how a few minutes fun with these tasks can really deepen your learning.
- To be announced later
Next Session
- To be announced later
Hypnosis Practice Workshop
Facilitators: Brian Cullen & Brad Deacon
We’ve been thinking for a while of setting up a hypnosis workshop for people with a real interest in developing their hypnosis skills more fully.
What is hypnosis?
There are many different definitions for hypnosis. In our view, we see it as something that everyone does naturally all the time as we move from one state of mind to another. Richard Bandler talks about the trances that we live by: our morning trance, our work trance, our television-watching trance. Most of the time, we are entering these altered states without any awareness, and practicing hypnosis skills allows us to gain much more control over those states within ourselves and others.
Why practice hypnosis?
Hypnosis is a great tool for helping yourself and others to enter into more useful states in order to enjoy life and be more effective in many ways.
Professionally
If you are a teacher, for example, educational hypnosis will enable you to get your students into an appropriate state for learning – a state in which they are curious and motivated towards learning. In any other job, too, being able to use hypnosis more effectively will really help your communication and allow you to achieve your professional goals more effectively.
Personally
In your personal life, hypnosis can not just help your relationships, but also give you much more fun in every aspect of your life by allowing you to enter into the appropriate state for the activity that you are carrying out. How much more enjoyable does music become when you can completely immerse yourself in it, perhaps allowing the musical sounds to naturally bring up images and feelings in your body that enhance your enjoyment?
Helping Others
Practicing your hypnosis skills can help you to help the people around you that you care about. Many of the problems that people face in life can be solved when they realize their own resourcefulness, but these same problems prevent them from entering a resourceful state. Through hypnosis, you can help them to enter a more resourceful state when necessary and to access these resources.
What will we be doing in the hypnosis practice workshops?
The name says it all, really. We’ll be practicing hypnosis – and we’ll be doing it in a safe, confidential environment where you can develop your skills easily. The participants will act as practice subjects for each other. All people are different and pass between different states in different ways, so you will have the opportunity to practice different skills as you work with people in the workshop. Of course, we’ll also be having fun while we practice. If you’ve heard of Bandler and Grinder’s original workshops where they wanted to have fun learning about the possibilities of hypnosis, then you’ll know exactly the kind of spirit of fun experimentation that we want in the workshops.
How will we practice?
There are a large number of books/DVDs etc. available to learn hypnosis, and there are many different schools. One of the most straightforward and clearest books that we have found is Hypnosis for Beginners by Dylan Morgan. Apart from being very well written, it has the added bonus of being available as a free download from the author’s website:
http://www.hypno1.co.uk/BookHypnosisForBeginners.htm
We would suggest that all participants get a copy of this book and read at least the first few chapters before the workshops begin. It will give you a very clear idea of the simple exercises and exploratory approach that we want to promote in the workshops. Clearly, many of the participants are not beginners, but we have all come from different backgrounds and revisiting the basics in an open-minded and exploratory style will certainly be of benefit to all. It will help us all to practice tools of hypnosis that we may not even have been aware of yet.
We will prepare exercises based on this book. Initially, we’d like to work through those exercises and then later, we can open up the workshop to a wider range of ideas from participants and other sources.
Who will the participants be?
We envision a group of 6-10 people who have a serious interest in learning more about hypnosis and improving their skills through practice over an extended period of time. If you recognize yourself in this description, we would be very happy to have you join us. Also, if you know of like-minded people who are curious and willing to learn (even those who have no background in hypnosis), we welcome them as long as they respect the confidentiality and exploratory focus of the workshops.
When, where, how often?
Currently, we are thinking of holding the workshop once a month, probably on a Wednesday evening from 7-9pm. Weekends are busy for many people with family and other activities, so we have deliberately made it a weekday night. The location depends somewhat on the participants. We have several possible locations including Shinsakae (Brian’s house), Fukiage/Tsuruma (Nagoya Institute of Technology), and Yagoto (Nanzan University). Once we have a good idea of the participants, we will choose the most convenient location.
Some time back, I posted an article about the NLP allergy relief process, and I am happy to say that it seems to have been successful for me this year. Apart from a couple of days when I was over-busy, I have been almost symptom-free this year with a noticeable lack of sneezing, blocked-nose, and sore throat. This is a good thing indeed, especially since the pollen count this year was far far higher than other years–ten times the level of last year’s pollen count according to some sources.
Perhaps, it is fairer to point out that I have made several changes that could have influenced the allergic reaction that I used to have.
1. NLP Allergy Relief Process
2. A less-stressed life style
3. A better diet, with less meat and dairy
4. Time: It’s was about seven or eight years when I first perceived an allergic response to pollen. I have heard that every cell in the body gets replaced over a seven-year cycle, so there is the possibility that I have simply grown out of it.
5. Netti Pot: For the last five months or so, I have using a netti pot (thanks for the tip, Maria!) for nasal irrigation. Do a search on YouTube if you’re not familiar with the netti pot. It takes a couple of days to get used to, but once you do, nasal irrigation feels great and it actually feels odd on those days that I can’t do it for some reason.
I’m sure there are other factors, too. After another year or so, I’ll sit down and write a fuller article based on my condition at that point and my use of the NLP allergy relief process with others.
If you suffer from allergies, this season allows me to tell you that you can change that. If you’d like to try the NLP allergy relief process, get in touch and we’ll set something up.
One of the finest NLP trainers that I know, Richard Bolstad, will be carrying out a series of trainings in Japan between July and September. I have trained with Richard on many occasions and can highly recommend his training methods, his demonstrations, and his personal congruence. I have learned a lot from Richard and if you can get to Kyoto or Tokyo this year, take the opportunity to learn NLP from one of the best trainers out there! Details are at the link below:
http://www.nlptrainingsjapan.jp/schedule-prices/index.html
Here is an interesting research study about how metaphor use in discussion about crime affects people’s perceptions and reactions.
How metaphors shape the debate about crime fighting.
©2011 by Dr. Brian Cullen
This article briefly describes two models that can be used in coaching.
Logical Levels
A common model used in NLP, life coaching, and business coaching is Robert Dilt’s Logical Levels, also called by several other names such as Neuro-Logical levels. In this model, a person is asked to view their goals, issues and actions at a number of levels. These are described briefly below with some questions that can be asked to elicit that particular level.
Environment
This is the lowest level and includes our workplace, our homes, and our neighbourhoods. It can also refer to the interaction environments of a relationship, for example a husband and wife, or a boss and employee.
Think of the situation where you have this issue. What do you see around you? Who is there?
Behaviours
What are you doing in that situation?
Capabilities
What could you be doing in that situation? Are there other behaviours that you are capable of that could produce a more useful result?
Beliefs and Values
What do you believe about that situation? What is important to you about that situation? How would the situation have to be completely resolved so that you felt good about it?
Identity
Who are you in that situation?
Dilts suggests taking a step forward for each level to provide a series of kinesthetic anchors. Above the Identity level, it may also be useful to step into the Spirit level asking a question like What is beyond you or bigger than you that you want to contribute to through this situation?
Circles
Another model used in coaching that is very similar to the Logical Levels is based on the idea of a series of concentric circles spreading out from a person. Below, I have used a formulation of this model presented by Steve G. Jones. This model is generally used by the coach to apply to herself, so the center of all the circles can be considered to be the coach herself.
Inner Circle: Self-Awareness
The inner circle corresponds to Dilts’ idea of Identity and perhaps includes some of the Spirit level. In this circle, the coach becomes aware of her own identity, becoming centered in her own body and identity so that she can have the resources to help another person.
2nd Circle: Needs, Values, and Beliefs
This corresponds directly to Dilts’ level of Beliefs and Values. The coach moves outward from the core identity and recognizes the beliefs and values that she is bringing to a coaching situation. While the coach may not agree with all the client’s beliefs and values, an assessment of her own beliefs and values will better allow her to keep in mind that the map is not the territory and that different beliefs and values may be equally valid.
3rd Circle: Exploring options and taking action
This combines the Capabilities and Behaviours levels of Dilts’ model. In this circle, the coach considers the options available to coach a client towards fulfilling his goals and begins to take actions to move the client forward. This combination of two levels does perhaps have the disadvantage of over-equating capabilities and behaviours and overlooking other possible alternatives which may be available.
4th Circle: Empowering Questions
The 4th circle is the outer circle of this model of coaching and expands as necessary. The use of questions rather than advice, critique, or other words is interesting since it reminds us that the onus for change is ultimately on the client rather than the coach. The coach is the one who can help the client to reach greater self-awareness and to recognize his resources, but it is the client who must respond to the empowering questions with actions that will allow him to achieve his goals.
©2009 by Dr. Brian Cullen
Before we begin, I’d like to tell you a story because stories are wonderful for teaching, and wonderful for learning. In fact, research has shown that people learn 25% more when they relax before learning. And when I was growing up, my uncle used to tell me stories all the time, down by the sea, where the wind and the salt water would sometimes get in your eyes and make you blink. And blink again with the freshness and new feeling. Now he felt that stories were at the heart of communication, and he said that his grandfather told him the same stories. And his grandfather would always begin a story by saying, “Let your eyes grow sleepy now as you listen to this story that comes to us from a far off place now.”
And to really understand this story, you might want to really imagine it and the best way to do that is to just step into the relaxed feeling of letting your mind really flow with the story. So as you really enjoy that feeling, you might like to take the chance to relax even more so you can let your unconscious imagine the story really well and let yourself remember it at an even deeper level.
You know the story of Cinderella, don’t you. How it came to be that the Prince found Cinderella by placing the glass slipper on the foot of every woman in the city. And they lived happily ever after.
Or did they live happily ever after?
They got married in the winter, you know, and those first couple of months were wonderful as they gazed into each others eyes, listened to beautiful music together, held hands on their long walks, and talked late into the night.
When Spring came, they were discussing what to do for on one of the few free evenings that they didn’t have an official royal function.
So on this free night, the Prince said: “Cinderella, let’s go out to meet everyone and have some drinks under the cherry blossoms. There’ll be a great atmosphere down there tonight.” Later we’ll go dancing at the Undecided Fairy club and we’ll have a real ball.”
“Really?,” said Cinderella, doubtfully. “Actually, I was just hoping that we could just sit in and read this evening. I’m feeling a little tired. We could take a walk through the blossoms tomorrow – just the two of us. It’ll be lovely and peaceful then.”
“Hey, we’re going to have a great time,” he said. Come on, Cindy. What you really need is a good night out to energize you.”
And they just couldn’t seem to agree. So they had an argument, their first if the truth be told, and the truth is always told in fairy tales.
Spring drew to a close and the weather became warmer and warmer. And by summer, things were again fine between the loving couple. The weather was just glorious, so the King asked the Prince and Princess to host a great beach party for all the children of the country.
“Oh great”, said Cinderella. “We’ll have to order lots of buckets and spades. Let’s get the order in today to make sure that they arrive in plenty of time. And transportation – we’ll hire a team of buses to get them all down to the beach. Hmm, one last thing – oh yes, the weather. Can you talk to your fairy godmother and arrange some sun for the day?”
“Wait a minute, Cindy. Not so quick. This is a really interesting opportunity. Let’s think about all the possibilities for a while.”
They talked for a couple of minutes and Cinderella began to get hot and bothered. “Why can’t he just make a simple decision? We have to act now. It’s so simple and we just need to get to the point. Obviously, we just arrange some simple buckets and spades and set up a sandcastle building contest”
Meanwhile, the Prince was thinking, “why oh why can’t she see the big picture? This is such a wonderful opportunity for development for these children. There are so many possibilities and we really need to think through each one before we reach a decision.”
Within just a few minutes, they were screaming at each other, and then shouting all sorts of silly stuff that they had kept bottled up inside.
In early Autumn, they had again forgiven each other, but they didn’t quite understand the other’s point of view. It was worrying both of them quite a bit, especially now that they were trying to make an important decision together: choosing the location for the new palace. The real estate agent took them off to see the location and explained all the great features. The Prince was really impressed. It was on a great hill with a fine view. The rock was solid enough to be a strong foundation and there was no history of earthquakes in the area. They wandered around the site and the Prince was delighted. But Cinderella didn’t look quite so happy. Finally, she said, “yes, I know that it’s a very logical choice. Everything seems right, but it just doesn’t feel right.”
“Doesn’t feel right?! Here we are making the biggest purchase of our lives and you’re just worried about your feelings.”
“Exactly,” said Cinderella angrily. “We’re going to live here, so it has to feel exactly right.”
“It will feel right”, said the Prince. “Because all the right features are here. Just look around you and use your head.”
So they had their third argument, the biggest one yet.
But they didn’t quite understand how the other person was thinking. Everyone has arguments, but these seemed to go right to important issues that they needed to sort out.
When winter came to the land, they decided to plan their honeymoon. They had been so busy with royal duties and the wedding and officially opening statues of glass slippers that they hadn’t had time to go on a honeymoon.
“Where shall we go?”, asked the Prince cautiously. He was being careful tonight after all the arguments. He was going to let Cinderella have her way as much as possible. After all, she was the woman and the honeymoon would be more important to her.
“Oh, I don’t know”, answered Cinderella. How about just taking a couple of horses out and heading down south for a couple of weeks?
“What do you mean?” This is our honeymoon!,” stuttered the prince. We’ll have to book the hotels and arrange for the carriages and notify all the towns in advance so that the people can come out to wave at us.”
“We don’t need to worry about any of that stuff. Let’s just go with the flow. I don’t like to plan too much. It just gets in the way of having fun.”
“Gets in the way of having fun?! How can we possibly have fun if we don’t know what we’re going to be doing?”
Oh dear, yet another argument.
They say that you shouldn’t allow any communication strain in a relationship last more than a week without addressing, so they decided to call on the Wizard, a great counselor who could surely help them to save their marriage. After all, it would be embarrassing if they had to get a divorce after the fairy story books had already been written.
So off they went to the wizard’s den where the wizard asked them to tell him about the problems between them.
The Prince said: “Wizard, we need your help. She is just incomprehensible. Take out your wand. We need to change her into a normal person.”
“What”, cried Cinderella. “You want to change me. I’m the one who’s normal. You’re the crazy one. Wizard, get out your wand and change this man into something that I can understand, a frog, for example. ”
“Oh dear,” said the wizard. “I see that you two really do have some problems understanding each other.
And then he said something really strange, so out of the blue that it made them really curious about what he was trying to communicate.
***
Because communication can be strange sometimes, can’t it? Sometimes, we have real difficulty in understanding someone’s else view of the world.
For example, I read a funny story about teaching the other day.
There was a rather eccentric lecturer named John Moffit. John was known for his strong view about the role of the teacher. One of the other lecturers arrived at work on this particular morning and passed by the main lecture theatre on the way to his class. He happened to glance in, and saw John Moffit giving a most rousing lecture from the front of the room. John was gesturing enthusiastically, and eagerly writing on the board. But when the other lecturer looked around the lecture theatre, it was totally empty. A little concerned about John’s sanity, he decided to raise the matter gently at morning tea later on.
“John,” he observed “I saw you teaching over in the lecture theatre this morning.”
“Yeeees.” John replied with a wide smile.
“But John, I must say I noticed that there didn’t seem to be any students there.”
“Yes, thet’s right. No-one turned up this morning.”
“And I noticed,” the other man continued, “that you were still teaching.” He waited hoping for some simple explanation.
Sure enough, John replied “Yes, thet’s right. Well, they pay me to teach, and that’s what I was doing!”
“It was at this moment”, the other lecturer told me, “that you realize that teaching and learning are two separate things”.
And you realize that people’s attitudes to teaching and indeed their attitudes to the whole world are completely different. And that’s where Metaprograms come in. Because you’ll also notice when you look at people that some people are different in the same way. In other words, their differences show certain patterns. And these same differences are metaprograms, and I think they are very useful for thinking about teaching and learning, and in fact in all types of communication. You can think of metaprograms as strategies that we use to put our values into action. Because when we are trying to communicate, we are trying to open up communication channels, to engage in communication, not necessarily trying to persuade or accept another person’s values.
***
So the wizard said to Cinderella and the Prince: “I see that you two really do have some problems understanding each other.
And then he said something really strange, so out of the blue that it made them really curious about what he was trying to communicate.
Alright, both of you, please take off your shoes.”
“Our shoes?!”
“Yes, yes, quickly take off your shoes.”
Looking very confused, the Prince took off his great big black size 11 hunting boots and Cinderella took off her beautiful, dainty size 5 glass slippers.
“Now,” said the wizard. “Put on each others shoes.”
“What?”, said both of them together.
“They’re too big and horrible,” shouted Cinderella just as the Prince was shouting, “they’re much too small and dainty.”
“Quiet, both of you,” said the wizard sharply, “or I really will use my wand and change you both into pumpkins and eat you for my supper.”
So the Prince and Cinderella looked at each other worriedly and quickly put on each others shoes.
“Now,” said the wizard. “Walk around the large courtyard past the fountain and don’t even dream of coming back before you have finished.”
So the Prince got up and promptly fell over as his huge size 11 feet slipped out of the dainty glass slippers. And Cinderella landed down on the ground next to him as her tiny size 5 feet got lost in his big black size 11 hunting boots.
“Up, up, and out of my sight,” shouted the wizard, waving his wand and shouting out a strange incantation: “Tea-a-me-Ton-a-me, Got-a-be, Song”.
Seeing and hearing this, the Prince and Princess scurried out of the wizard’s den, half crawling, half walking, fully annoyed at the crazy old man.
“He’s mad, you know,” said the Prince. “We should never have gone to him. He’s gone and cast some crazy spell on us. I should have listened to my friends. They said he’s completely flipped since the territory war with the Fairy Godmother.”
“Oh shut up and leave her out of it.” said Cinderella. “Let’s get this over with. How on earth do you walk in these things? They are so ungainly. I never knew that you had such big feet. You must trip over yourself all the time.”
“Trip up? What are you talking about? I’m Prince Charming, you know. You didn’t notice me tripping up when we were dancing at the ball, did you?”
“Well no, I guess not,” said Cinderella.
“And how do you get around in these tiny things? They’re made of glass, you know. Aren’t you afraid of breaking them?”
“Of course not. They’re absolutely perfect for me. Just you be careful with them.”
“I am being careful, really careful”, said the Prince. “It’s funny. They seemed so odd to walk in at first, but it is becoming a little easier now.”
“Yes, you’re right”, answered Cinderella. It is funny that these boots aren’t quite as bad as they were before. With a couple of weeks of Sunday newspaper supplements stuffed in the toes, I could probably wear them comfortably enough. But of course, I wouldn’t want to.”
“No. That would be silly,” said the Prince, “but I do know how you can like these slippers. They are awfully pretty and they suit you.”
And as the couple walked around the courtyard, they talked more freely than they had done in months. It felt like they were actually communicating again and they even started to laugh at their own predicament.
And by the time, they came back around past the fountain, they were hobbling along hand in hand, laughing and giggling like two little garden gnomes.
“Hey wizard, we’re back”, called out the Prince when they turned the corner and saw him waiting at the door of his den, a peaceful look upon his old face.
The wizard gestured to them to sit down and poured them some tea.
“So you two seem to be getting on a little better.”
“Yes, what was that spell that you cast on us when we left?”, asked Cinderella. “It must have been very powerful to work so quickly.”
“Spell?”, asked the wizard. “I didn’t cast any spell on you. I just cast a spell to boil water for the tea. I can’t use my wand to bring you two back together. That would be a breach of ethics and the Merlin league would throw me out right away.”
“So what did you do,” asked Cinderella.
The wizard laughed and answered, “I just wanted you to remember the old saying: ‘You’ll never really understand someone until you walk in their shoes for a mile.”
The couple looked at each other in confusion while the wizard continued: “You two, more than anyone else in the country should have realized that. Cinderella, don’t you remember that your shoes were created by magic. They were created just for you. And my noble Prince, I thought you would have remembered how everyone has different feet. How many ladies did you try to put that same glass slipper onto?
“Oh hundreds and hundreds,”answered the Prince, “but Cinderella is unique. She’s completely unique. That’s why I love her so much.”
“And you’re unique, too, my great bigfooted Prince. How many other guys would have been so patient? You’re completely crazy, but I love you so much.”
And so the wizard showed them how they could understand each other and experience the world in a different way by wearing different shoes.
And just before they went off to live happily ever after, the Prince turned back and said to the wizard, “thank you so much wizard, you really do have powerful magic”.
“Of course I have magic,” snorted the wizard. “We all have magic in every word that we say. But everyone responds to that magic in their own unique way. You can be a wizard. Just learn the structure of magic.”
***
Note
This is a story that I wrote for a seminar on metaprograms that I carried out a few years ago for a teacher training session. I can’t remember where the story in the middle about the teachers came from. I may have written it myself or adapted it from somewhere else.